Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Randomize