apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Randomize
