when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
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