am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
