He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
