I wanna passion pit in your ass
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Randomize
