Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
Randomize
