It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Michael Bay diarrhea
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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