I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
