I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
