'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
