he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Randomize
