I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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