3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize