I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
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