But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
