kristin has been a bad kristin
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
