If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
