we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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