Someone shit on the floor
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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