i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
