There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Randomize
