omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
