My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
