thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Randomize
