What a fucking waste of an outfit
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
She's the barista slut.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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