escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
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