You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
how drunk are you?
Several
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
