There is no way he is gay with that hair.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize