Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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