It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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