This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
My pussy is not your playground.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
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