i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Randomize
