scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Randomize