if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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