Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
