you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Randomize