My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
