you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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