he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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