Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Randomize
