Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
