There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
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