i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
