Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
