I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
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