I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize