I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Randomize
