That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Randomize
