i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
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